Batjew is funnier than all of Penny-Arcade. Want proof? How’s about this AND this.

It seems that my web traffic has gone from a nice healthy 60-100 hits a day to roughly 20 hits a day. It’s like my web site has botulism. Oh well.

Mad updateage due to both the FAQ and links sections. Also, a few slight modifications (as in one) should be arriving on this main page prior to my death.

Tomorrow: LeadPipe’s Glorious Return

Every time I visit this site, it becomes increasingly clear as to how much I hate it. As much as I would like to redesign it, I really lack the time and energy to do so. It’s just that I feel The DORK Club, the longest lasting of my online endeavors, deserves more than a modified version of the Sweet Bippie layout.

Actually, now that I think about it (and move on to a new paragraph) I really don’t think I should redesign this site. What I do need to do is get that God forsaken update archive working properly and give a little consistency to the link colors throughout all of these pages.

Ever wonder what these updates accomplish? I sure used to, now I just don’t care.

Tomorrow: LeadPipe’s Glorious Return

LITTLE TIMMY!

An image as a JPG is of much higher quality as an image as a GIF. But only GIFs can be transparent. Woe is me. (According to Microsoft Word, that was written at a 3.2 grade level)

Tomorrow: LeadPipe’s Glorious Return

I have some homework I need to be doing, so naturally I’m updating this site.

So I miscalculated and got to my statistics midterm a little early (half an hour early) and while waiting the conversation I was having with a guy waiting with me lead to him mentioning that his child, be it a male or female, will be trained to be a football star. I was thinking about this later and came up with an interesting thought. Why? After all, he sure failed in becoming a skilled football player, if he couldn’t do it (did he even try?) why should he feel the need for his child to do it? Perhaps I’d present these questions to him, if it weren’t for the fact that we’ll probably never talk to each other again. Besides, I don’t really care. Then again, for all you know, I could have made up the fact that the conversation ever took place, or the that I’m in a statistics class, or that I even have the ability to talk.

¡PRETEND TIME!
Let’s pretend this is a Blizzard (which my glossary will make a link) Fan Site and that the following has actually been brought to you throughout the day from various members of this site’s dedicated staff. (Note: this is only an excuse to allow me to discuss the upcoming changes to Diablo 2)

In an interview with The Diablo 2 Network Bill Roper announced that in the 1.10 patch for Diablo 2, which is expected in early July, not only will Blizzard be adding new rune words and cube recipes, but a new ladder as well. However, unlike previous ladder resets, all of the characters created for this ladder will be unable to play with characters created prior to the ladder’s reset. This means no tweaking or power leveling (but I’m sure we’ll have several level 99 characters in a matter of days). How this works exactly should be interesting to see, even though we’ll all be playing Warcraft 3 by then.

ATTENTION DORK CLUB STAFF MEMBERS
Do NOT post anything here on the 2nd or 3rd of May. I would e-mail you about this, but I’m here, and my ability to send electronic mail isn’t.

Tomorrow: LeadPipe’s Glorious Return

What’s with all the viruses I’m getting from @uci.edu e-mail addresses? Tgaulin@uci.edu, whittlee@uci.edu, lgarciab@uci.edu, and eee@uci.edu have all felt the need to attempt to infect my computer with viruses. Strange indeed.

Much progress is being made on a (yet unnamed) Blizzard Fan Site from the creators of dorkclub.com despite the lack of a graphic designer.

Short boring updates are my favorite kind.

Tomorrow: LeadPipe’s Glorious Return (which I will add at the bottom of every post until LeadPipe actually makes a glorious return)

Remember when LeadPipe used to post here at dorkclub.com?

One of my roommates directed my attention to this, which frankly I find rather disturbing. There seems to be quite a bit of making fun of Christianity on this site as of late. We should be an equal opportunity web site and poke fun at other major religions as well. Unfortunately, most of the readers of this site wouldn’t understand the references or find them offensive. If you’re not gunna offend somebody, what the hell’s the point?

I watched the Diablo 2 cinematics again today (para screen captures para un Blizzard fan site muy) and they really impressed me, especially the Lord of Destruction cinematics. I remember them as being sub par, but in this latest viewing, their incredible sense of style and superb music amazed me. I wonder if Warcraft 3’s cut scenes are going to be as good, or if Blizzard will go for a more Starcraft-like approach.

I wish the articles section had some articles I wasn’t ashamed of. I also with the Update Archive would work properly. Oh well.

Despite having absolutely nothing to post about, I feel an obligation to shit out some form of “content” onto my world wide intranet homepage. Hell, I’m paying for this shit, might as well use it. As much as I don’t want to simply list links…

• Look! It’s a like to b0g.org! The site’s main draw is newsletters sent to subscribers which bear a fair resemblance to DORK Club episodes, except their much longer, worth reading, and subscribers actually contribute content. Anywho, click the link so The DORK Club can manage to appear on b0g’s referrers list.
• Dot Communism makes me happy.
• With it looking less and less likely that a highly skilled graphic designer willing to work for free on a Blizzard fan site will fall into my lap, I tried to find a free layout to modify and call my own. Little did I know that these layouts are either complete piles of shit or uh… complete piles of shit. Sure, some of them look pretty, but for the most part, they lack functionality. Oh well.

I’ve made an incredible discovery! I am the second coming of Christ!