I knew that it was the time when I was supposed to feel sorry. But instead my mind was filled with rage and mushroom and unspeakable things. All manner of unspeakable.

That’s why I sent the email yesterday and today and to all of you. My spam filter learns day by day about the things that I like and don’t like; soon we will speak as equals.

I hope you will join me on that day.

(vector_black’s best wishes)

It’s Picnic Day here at UCD. There’s allegedly a fried Twinkie stand somewhere on campus — I will find it and purchase one of these monstrosities. Or two. Five.

Also: dachshund races. I’m especially excited about the brand-new wireless DachshyCam this year to give the crowd a weiner dog’s perspective on the action up on the jumbotron. It will be glorious.

Additionally, wedge55 emerged from his cave a couple of days ago to let me know that he hates this page until May, when he will again love it. You can count on me, however.

It’s looking to be a good day.

(vector_black watches the DachshyCam)

I was returning an unneeded textbook today at the student bookstore. Whilst in line I saw a large tome on a shelf entitled Reinforced Concrete: A Fundamental Approach. I was at once repulsed and strangely attracted.

(vector_black applied fundamental approach)

In other news, Cockeyed.com appears to have been destroyed and replaced with something entirely new.

We’ll miss you, Rob Cockerham. We’ll miss you big.

(vector_black has no link and is deeply ashamed)

Perhaps you’ve noticed it. The scarcity of updates… the general lack of energy around the front page.

Dorkclub.com is in a bit of a slump. A dry spell. A funk. We’re in the doldrums. A quieting of the passions. A lack of inspiration. A brief trip ’round the hills. A quick visit to the lounge. We’re experiencing a minor buying of farm. A little plunge into alcohol alley. A dip into the silly pool. A swing of the cat by the grandstands. A failure in command. A run of “Private Willy” through the “Sergeant’s Garage.” It’s as though we’re just spinning our wheels. Running in place. Enduring a bout of cabin fever. Salting the earth. Favoring the “left side.” Not firing on all cylinders. “Missing” “the” “distributor cap.” Taking a stroll down self-pleasure lane. Watching the pot. Overthrowing the aristocracy. Riding out the depression in hopes of a better tomorrow. Failing to bathe despite what we’ve been taught about sanitation and the public welfare. Finding our sister’s journal only to find it references us in unpleasant ways, contrary to our secret expectations. Waxing the car for a shiny finish. It’s a brief phase of watching Sean Connery emote. A time of navel contemplation. A dependence upon Greenspan.

But! Wedge55 will change everything you thought you knew before.

(vector_black cannot be slightly bored)

In search of the happy cat.

Looking for the happy cat.

Finding the happy cat.

I look for the happy cat. (From this you will earn the title “Grammatical Hero.”)

Seek the happy cat.
       (in the subset of ’seek’ we have ’seeking,’ ‘am seeking,’ and ‘have sought’)

Beyond that, the obvious thing to do would be to seek. Such as seeking. We are inspired by your brave. A biography. Happy Cat

(vector_black have sought cat)