Whenever I post something I want to stay up top for a while, the staff here is obliged to scroll it into oblivioin. On the other hand, if I’m embarrassed to have bothered, they make sure it gets top billing for as long as possible.

You suck, DORK Club, and that makes me sad.

My dog has a great strategy to get you to throw a ball for him to do the fetching of: He drops it on your crotch. Then he looks you in the eye. He’s laughing at you, now. You KNOW he will grab that ball between his powerful jaws, any second now. He looks up at you. He looks down at your crotch. He looks back up, and grins.

And you know what you do?

At this point, buddy, you throw that ball.